When all the noise fades away

Friends. Coffee. Sunshine. Work. Good news. The past three days have simply been good. And that is something I haven't been able to say as frequently as I would like lately, so it has been extra delightful for all of the noise in my life to fade away for a bit so that I could just enjoy myself.

If you can't get around it...

If you can't get around it, get into it.

I don't know where I came across this quote, but it's been bouncing around my head the last few days. I put it into practice this evening by tackling the pile of dishes while listening to jazz music and talking to my mom on the phone.

Parallel Universe

I'd been rehearsing this moment for hours, and I had outlined a hundred different scenarios. Mr. Jensen once tried to tell us that there existed somewhere a set of parallel universes, unreachable but real, where every possibility came true; whatever didn't happen here happened somewhere else, each option unfolding in a separate universe. But in this one world, at least, the outcome that morning was reduced finally to just this one version. 

-- Karen Thompson Walker, The Age of Miracles

Maybe in some parallel universe there is a Breanna who lives in an apartment that doesn't make her cry on a daily basis. Sadly, it isn't this one.

Give Me Fog

If I had to pick a favourite weather-related phenomenon, it would probably be fog. I think it is simply gorgeous. Every time I come across it I feel as if my heart and soul are deeply satisfied. There are very few weather patterns that do this for me. I am not one of those people who always wants sunshine and heat, I only enjoy snow for brief periods of time, biting cold is only okay when I can curl up inside with friends or a book, rain is wonderful until I have to walk a long way...but fog, fog and I are always friends. Sure, it wreaks havoc with my hair, but I love it anyway. I love the mystery of it. I love the comfort of it. I love the staggering beauty of it.

When I left the pub last night the entire town was blanketed in fog. It was beautiful, and I wished with everything in me that I had my camera with me. Since I didn't, I just walked home as slowly as possible, enjoying every second of it.

A Question for Y'all

I don't normally air ideas that I am simply musing about on the internet, but in this case I am making an exception because I need some feedback. I'm thinking about starting up an Etsy shop to sell some prints of my photographs. Is this a good idea? Would any of you buy prints? Do you know anyone who might buy prints? What kind of images would you like to see available for purchase? What kind of price bracket would you like to see them in? Let me know in the comments here, or, if you know me personally, you can contact me whatever way your heart desires.

If I'm going to be an insomniac...

...then I might as well make good use of the fact that I am awake in the middle of the night.

I've been a bit stressed out this week. That's a wild understatement. I've been stressed out this week. It's been like a consistent hum in the back of my brain. Of course, this means that sleep tends to elude me no matter how physically exhausted I am. And trust me, I've tried; the other night I went for an hour long walk after being at the pub in an effort to tire myself out. So tonight I just decided that if I am going to be awake anyway, then I might as well do useful things. So I did some laundry, made a card to send to my friend, washed my dishes, and went on a night photo excursion on the dykes. I spent probably 30-45 minutes out there taking shots, and I came away with a couple of pretty good ones, including this one. I also had a random conversation with a guy who was out there (there are other people who wander around the dykes at midnight?). After a while though, the consistency of distant lightning flashes was starting to increase and I was getting a little concerned that I would be blindsided by a thunderstorm out there, so I packed myself up and headed home.

Less-than-eloquent Thoughts

I am not feeling very eloquent lately. Perhaps I only get a certain allotted amount of eloquence per month, and I used it all up on that maid of honour speech.


It's been a couple of days since I got home from a jaunt to Edmonton, and I am still struggling to get going. It has left me feeling profoundly unlike myself.


As much stress and constant running around was involved with the wedding last weekend, I kind of miss having one single thing to worry about. It was a nice change of pace.


Taking photos out of plane windows has possibly become one of my new favourite things.

Happy Canada Day!

Or, Happy Dominion Day!

Yes, I am aware that this is not the Canadian flag. See, for the past few years I've spent Canada Day at places like Fort Edmonton and the Ukrainian Heritage Village, where they put on Dominion Day events. I therefore don't really have a time-period appropriate picture to post today. Oh well. I have history-buff friends who will appreciate this.

I'm off to spend the day in Halifax with some friends. I hope you are having a lovely long weekend.

Disconnect

I've recently become addicted to Instagram. I just joined the world of Twitter. I've been on Facebook for a few years now. I run two blogs. I have a Tumblr. I enjoy Pinterest. I am well-versed in the world of social media.

I text my friends pretty consistently. I use Skype to stay in touch with loved ones who are far away. I am almost always connected to my email in some form. My computer is on for most of the day. I am not technologically illiterate by any means.

And yet.

Sometimes I have an overwhelming urge to unplug everything, just turn it all off and walk away. I call it my "hermit urge." Sometimes I just don't want to be accessible 24-7.

I've been placed in a couple of situations lately where I was reminded of how nice it is to disconnect from time to time. I recently got back from a quick trip to Toronto, and it was kind of lovely to turn my phone and computer off for a couple of hours, to have no obligation to speak to anyone at all (aside from the precocious six-year-old who proposed to me on my flight home).

The flight from Toronto to Halifax is about 2 hours, and as soon as I landed I had 5 text messages. One was from the person picking me up at the airport. One was from a friend in Edmonton who I had been texting while I was waiting in the airport. Three were from someone trying to schedule a meeting this week. These were the ones that really got me. They were sent in quick succession. The first was a question about what times worked well for me. The second was a variation on "I need to know now." And the third was simply three question marks: ???. As soon as I read these messages I could feel stress settling itself back on my shoulders. I wanted to turn my phone back off and pretend I hadn't read them. In fact, I ignored them for a while. Eventually though, I had to respond. I sent an apologetic text explaining that I hadn't responded because I had been on a plane, all the while thinking that it was ridiculous that I had to excuse myself for taking a couple of hours to get back to someone about something.

I love that I can stay connected with people so easily and in so many ways. But sometimes it's nice to walk away from the constant stream of information, and to remove myself from the frantic race to respond to everyone whenever they decide they need me.

Of course, this works the other way around as well. I killed my phone a couple of days ago, and not having it was fun at first, but has rapidly just become frustrating.

Flying for the First Time

Flying for the First Time
Elenowen

Can't put out the fire with my bare hands,
not even I need to understand how
I'm getting there.

Said a prayer with broken wings,
hoping to move toward greater things now
and face the fear.

I'm drifting
closer toward the skyline,
looking down on my life,
trying to get just one thing right.
The second I stop second-guessing,
let go like a confession,
seeing what I was born to find.
Flying for the first time.

I was the kind who played it safe,
wouldn't take a risk or leap of faith,
not before the leap.

Fear has a way of playing games,
go a little, go your separate ways,
but as for me:

I'm drifting
closer toward the skyline,
looking down on my life,
trying to get just one thing right.
The second I stop second-guessing,
let go like a confession,
seeing what I was born to find.
Flying for the first time

Ran through the open flame,
barely escaped,
now I'll never be the same.

I'm drifting
closer toward the skyline,
looking down on my life,
trying to get just one thing right.
The second I stop second-guessing,
let go like a confession,
seeing what I was born
I'm drifting
closer toward the skyline,
looking down on my life,
trying to get just one thing right.
The second I stop second-guessing,
let go like a confession,
seeing what I was born to find.
Flying for the first time
Flying for the first time.

I put out the fire with my bare hands.


I mentioned yesterday that I spent my whole day listening to the new Elenowen EP on repeat. I am seriously obsessed. I knew I needed to post a song on here, but couldn't decide which one to pick. Seriously. The album is that good. But since I'm rather obsessed with these airplane window pictures (watch for another one tomorrow) lately, I felt like the first track, Flying for the First Time, was a good choice. Plus starting at the beginning seems like a logical choice. I mean, if I am probably going to end up posting all of them, I might as well work my way through in order so I can keep track, no?

Heart-achingly Beautiful

heart-ache, n.
1. Pain in the heart; formerly = HEARTBURN
2. Pain or anguish of mind, esp. that arising from disappointed hope or affection.


I find the phrase "heart-achingly beautiful" rather useful at certain times of my life. When I am moved by something tremendously beautiful, I actually experience a physical sensation of heart-ache. Lately life has been heart-achingly beautiful; there is just so much joy kicking around that my heart feels a little full, and, consequently, a little achy in the best possible way.

Let's go on an adventure!

Thursday and Friday were full of adventures, which made for a rather delightful end to a week full of theory readings for my thesis. On Friday three of us jumped in the car on a sunshine-y blue-skies day, rolled down the windows and went for a drive. We originally intended to find one particular spot that we've heard really good things about, but instead we ended up getting lost and just driving around. Along the way we found this building that was absolutely falling apart, so we stopped to take some photos.

These are the kind of outings I associate with summer. Good friends, good weather, and nowhere in particular to be. I'm hoping for a lot more of these kinds of afternoons this summer.

Off to Montreal

My friend and I are headed to Monteral for Reading Week. I am terribly excited. So, it will be pretty quiet here on the blog for the next little bit. But fear not, I will come back armed with an incredible number of photos to share with all of you. Have a great week!

Don't bend me or I will break

Wake Me Up
Norah Jones

Wake me up when it's over
Wake me up when it's done
When he's gone away and taken everything
Wake me up

Wake me up when the skies are clearing
And the water is still
Because I will not watch the ship sail away
So please say you will

If it were any other day
This wouldn't get the best of me

But today I'm not so strong
So lay me down with a sad song
When it stops then you know
I've been gone too long

Don't shake me awake
Don't bend me or I will break
Find me somewhere between my dreams
With the sun on my face

I will still feel it later on
But for now I'd rather be asleep


Do you ever find yourself listening to a song over and over and over again? I do this all the time. If I had grown up in the age of records I would have been one of those people who played a single until the record actually warped. For the past few weeks this Norah Jones tune has been the one on endless repeat at my apartment.

Bragging Rights

When I decided to move out east I was frequently asked "Why would you want to move there?" (Most notably I was asked this by someone who was considering moving to Saskatchewan for a retail job...I asked him the same thing.) Well, this post is for all of you Albertan folks who couldn't fathom why I would want to come out here. 
Consider today's weather in the afternoon: 
Wolfville: 3C
Edmonton: -26C with -43C windchill
Friends, this may not be why I moved out here, but I sure am enjoying it.


(PS - We do now have some snow. Not a lot, but more than this photo.)

Rangy

rangy, adj.
4. Of great scope or compass; expansive, broad, wide-ranging


I've come to a realization as I've been doing ridiculous amounts of reading for papers in the past month or so: the work of the authors I love most is repeatedly described as "rangy." I think this is one of the qualities that draws me to them. It's why I find them so rich and deserving of attention that I eagerly anticipate each new release and contemplate writing PhD dissertations on their work. However, it is also why writing on them feels almost impossible. I never feel like I'm done. I always feel like there is some other idea to explore, some other thread to be picked up and followed on a long, glorious journey of discovery. I'm struggling with this right now as I'm trying to produce a polished, edited, pretty much complete chapter for my thesis. This just isn't how my brain works. There is too much for me to still explore at this stage in the game for me to be able to produce something that is, in any sense of the word, finished. Ah well, tomorrow evening I will have to hand something in, and hopefully it is good enough.

Here

I kind of love living here.


This past week was long and difficult, but somehow confirmed for me that I am exactly where I am supposed to be.

Don't Let Your Feet Touch Ground

Don't Let Your Feet Touch Ground
Ash Koley

Standing up straight I'm ten feet tall
I like this look, I love you all
A hundred feet off the ground it seems
That a beautiful day is gracing me

Don't let your feet touch ground
And don't look down
Don't let your feet touch ground
And don't look down

I pull my boots up to my knees
No coats or hats, thank you please
I dig up dirt and I find no wrong
All while singing a silly song

Don't let your feet touch ground
And don't look down
Don't let your feet touch ground
And don't look down

There are no mistakes
Up in our secret place
We're not just getting by
Everything is fine

Don't let your feet touch ground
And don't look down
Don't let your feet touch ground
And don't look down
Don't let your feet touch ground
And don't look down


I just got back from a whirlwind trip to Edmonton for a wedding of two friends. It was absolutely crazy, but absolutely worth it. As we were taking off from Halifax on Friday night, this song came on my iPod. So fitting right? And isn't this a pretty rocking view from the plane window? I sure thought so.

Eastern Bound

Turn Back Around
Lucy Schwartz

Show me the world in the shape of your looking glass
Beautifully bold when the colours unfold
Yes it's easy to see but it's harder to find
That I'm thinking of you and it's clear in my mind

So I turn turn turn
I turn back around
Turn turn turn
I turn back around
And I'm eastern bound

Almost let slip all these words at my fingertips
Still unaware of pen in my hand
But I'm making my way day by day coming back to you
Here unafraid of the path that I choose

So I turn turn turn
I turn back around
Turn turn turn
I turn back around
And I'm eastern bound

Turn turn turn
I turn back around
Turn turn turn
I turn back around
Yes I turn turn turn
I turn back around
(Eastern bound)
Turn turn turn
Turn back around
(Back to you)


So, this song is kind of my theme right now. See, in about 9 hours my plane leaves for Nova Scotia. So I am, in a very real sense, eastern bound. I don't know what my internet situation is going to be like for the next few days, but I will be back on here as soon as possible.

Ps. This is also the song that my blog title comes from, in case you didn't guess.

Contradictory Phenomena

If you've been following me for a while you might remember that back in September I shared a sepia version of this photo. It's from an afternoon I spent on my roommate's family farm in Lacombe. And I couldn't resist sharing the colour version with you as part of this Iconic Alberta series I've been doing for the last couple of days. Here's why: the sky. I know I've been talking about blue skies and white clouds, but there is this thing that the sky does here that I haven't experienced anywhere else I've travelled and this picture captures it perfectly. It can be completely cloudy out and yet it is so bright out that you feel the need to wear sunglasses. Perhaps this happens elsewhere and I just haven't been around at the right times, I don't know. But I always think of this as a curiously Albertan phenomenon. It's right up there with sun showers. The joke here often goes, if you don't like the weather, wait five minutes. Because it will change. And with no warning. And as a result we get these strange contradictory phenomena existing at the same time. Rain and sun, or, in this case, sunlight and clouds. It's kind of cool.